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if you know me, you know that i do not like spending time away from my wife. if you know me well then you know i am not very social and i don’t like large groups of people.
be that as it may, last night i found myself driving alone to a choir concert at College Of The Sequoias. my wife was hosting a table at our church’s annual women’s christmas dinner, so, rather than stay home and do nothing i decided to go and support zach, a fellow staff and worship team member, who sings with the COS Concert Choir and had a solo to boot.
i didn’t get any decent pictures because i was trying to honor the ‘no flash photography’ petition made at the beginning of the show. the theater is a comfortable one, probably seating about 400. i made my way to the top of the room, the very back actually, sitting left of center.
the concert was a bit oversold, so every seat was jammed packed…except the back row. i could tell that we all felt pretty smug about our choice, but then the inevitable “everyone needs to move into the center” annoucement was made.
now, i am a part of society and i want to be a productive, considerate part. i think my species is on the top of the endangered list, but still, i complied with the request and moved all the way into the center. to my right was a young lady who was obviously nervous, paranoid and stressed out that some stranger was sitting by her (if she only knew i felt the same way) and to my left was a young lady who made my experience in the back row excruciating. we will call her…The Ruinator.
The Ruinator immediately made a bad impression on me, forcefully stealing the shared arm of our 2 chairs. more importantly, she had so much make-up on i could smell it. so, for the next lengthy moments of my life i was forced to continually smell her makeup. sweat-repressing, powdered plastic…not a pleasant smell.
before the concert started The Ruinator was just going through her cell phone’s address book over and over and over and over again. click…click…click. as far as i could tell she wasn’t editing them or anything, just scrolling. scrolling and scrolling.
if you know me, you know that i do not like spending time away from my wife. if you know me well then you know i am not very social and i don’t like large groups of people. if you know me very well then you know that inane repetitions like scrolling through your address book over and over again just make me confused and disoriented and crazy.
but, The Ruinator has her right to her repetitions before the concert began, so i can’t really complain about that. finally the lights dimmed and the concert started. so what did The Ruinator do? she started playing Pac-Man on her phone. for 45 minutes.
of course she did.
the bright glow of the slider LCD display lit up one side of my face and half of my vision. as Pac-Man whirred and evaded the ghosts of the maze i was unable to neglect the plasticky click…click…click of the buttons. they were those really loud nokia type buttons.
“God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen Let…”
click…click…click
“Be It Ever So Humble There’s…”
click click…click…click click
(smell of caked on make-up)
“Domine Cristus…”
CLICK…CLICK…CLICK
and so forth. with each passing moment i realized my dilemma. if i shut my eyes my sense of hearing and smell increased, yielding a greater annoyance at her face-smell and phone sounds.
i began postulating things i could do. i thought “maybe if i just grabbed the phone and chucked it onto the stage it would hit one of the pots of poinsettas…win win.”
i decided i probably couldn’t do that, so i resolved that if i managed to make eye contact with The Ruinator (i gave her angry ‘what-are-you-doing’ glances every few minutes) then i would put on my toughest face and quietly but firmly say “PUT…AWAY…YOUR…PHONE.”
the occasion never presented itself. i realized that the only justice i could have was to blog about her inconsideration later.
that is, to say, blog about AND video tape her inconsideration:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ImfxT04HyJM[/youtube]
RUN PAC-MAN RUN! THE GHOSTS ARE COMING TO….EAT….YOU….
no, the video does not do it justice. but she did notice that i was video taping her phone, which i was secretly glad about.
all in all, i had an enjoyable time at the concert. zach did a great job…the best solo of the evening. and, the COS Chamber Singers did a lovely French piece (i left my program at home, thus no titles) that i thoroughly enjoyed. as thoroughly as i could with The Ruinator feasting on our shared experiences.
so, good job zach! and, to any ruinators out there, put your phones away and listen. maybe your brain will be entertained instead of just your thumbs.
here’s a clip of zach’s piece, a spanish song with a difficult range:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MhPB67aMyCw[/youtube]
well done zach.
blessings
