Jean Val Gene
i understand.
despite it being a one-syllable, four-letter name, Gene is neither common nor that easy to differentiate from the sounds of blenders, espresso machines, beeps, whistles and indie rock coming out of the surrounding speakers.
try it yourself. just say Gene and i think you’ll notice that it is one of the more garbley names out there.
however, something within me is always a little disappointed when i get a smoothie, milkshake or, in this case, short cappuccino back with my ‘name’ on it.
Jean is the most popular attempt, with runners up going to Jene, G and {no name written}. my personal favorite was the time i received my cup back with Chi written on the side.
ironically, i think Gene is the spelling/derivative i receive most seldom at this point.
today my Jean made me smile and then clued me in to at least two things:
the first was that i again realized how touchy we can be as a people. maybe it’s an american thing…maybe it’s a human nature thing, but i’m surprised at how i could actually take it personally that someone who doesn’t even know me might misspell or mis-hear my name! GASP! HORROR! THE HUMANITY!!!
we need to toughen up. we’re way too sensitive most of the time, especially in petty things like this. most of the offenses we feel are things that were never meant to offend or hurt us…we just decide that we’re offended.
why?
there is something within me that desires to be foremost and prominent, something selfish and ambitious and unforgiving. it’s the sin nature of course, but today it was interesting to see how that old man can display its toxicity even in something as simple as my name on a cup, looking for a way to reveal itself in all it’s self-centered, egotistical grossness. waiting for a moment where it might dominate my attitudes and decisions.
the second thing i realized is that, like it or not, simple portions of communication can offend or effect people negatively. maybe it’s not my fault, maybe it shouldn’t make someone upset, but the truth is, the way i communicate with people, from my words to my tone to my body language to the way i spell their name might potentially offend them, even if i don’t mean to.
i don’t think that means we live in fear, or that we become so bland and assuming that we never tell people the truth. obviously that isn’t the fix to our culture’s over-sensitivity to all things AND you can’t live life with out eventually offending someone.
so what do we do?
i suppose the check to people being offended is grace. and grace upon grace.
grace isn’t popular right now. the big names of ministry aren’t known for grace, but for other things. that’s just the swing we’re in for the time being.
but today i realized anew that grace is perhaps the most important virtue, and is one that i always need to be cultivating in my life.
because if people can get bent out of shape over a name on a cup, then i need to pay more attention to what i’m saying, singing, typing, writing and promoting.
what do you think?
in general, ministry | October 2nd, 2009
1) Just be glad your name isn’t Shequandra.
2) What plugin gives you those cool icons at the bottom of your post (I’m thinking it’s just on the mobile safari version)
3) Starbucks?
i always spell my name out (unless i go by my alias “alex” at starbucks or jamba juice) and i say “A” and the person will almost always write an “I” my name is a simple 4 letter name. if i say (eye-duh) i get it spelt Ida.. but as you say how can i be offended by someone who doesn’t even know me making an attempt to correctly spell my name when some in my family can’t even say it!
as for service (especially at a place that takes your name) i think it shouldn’t be wrong to ask “would you mind spelling that for me?” but i do love the blank and confused expressions.. i guess that will be something i’ll teach my kids so that they can make a heartfelt attempt to show some love!
How about trying “Gennaro” the next time? Do you think they can spell it? Loved the post!
i LOVE that you bring this up. i too used to get so annoyed when my cup would come back rachAel. UGH! how DARE they put that forbidden ‘A’ in rachel.
however, i too am trying to overcome myself. i think you touched on a simple point that has a lot of truth… i believe much of this DOES stem from our american culture and way of life. i hope to somehow continue to break-free of those silly hic-ups that we’ve (i’ve) created in life. at the end of the day, it JUST DOESN’T MATTER.
nice post.