tomorrow i’m headed out early to utah where i’ll be leading worship at calvary chapel salt lake city’s weekend services.

i’m a little apprehensive, as this is not something i usually do.

in fact, in the last…oh…10 years i’ve only traveled a few times for something like this. once in 2003 to estes park, colorado with my college’s worship team to play at a youth conference. once in 2005 the mrs and i drove to montana to play at a calvary in the bitterroot valley and now, it’s 2010 and i’m headed to salt lake.

also, i’m worried my guitar is going to be exploded by TSA. we’ll see.

in all honesty, i’m excited. very excited. it’s an honor to be asked to do something like this.

will try to give you updates, but when you don’t have an iphone it gets hard sometimes.

wish me luck.

so kelly and i have a sort of accidental hobby. while we’re motoring around we, like you, encounter our share of vanity license plates and interesting license frames on the vehicles around us (generally to the front). our hobby is to figure out what they could mean and why people choose to put what they do on the rear bumper of their car.

we do so for two reasons.

the first is because kelly has an unnatural talent for deciphering vowel-less and innumerated words.

the second is because if i can’t immediately understand the message presented to us, i become obsessed with trying to figure out what it means.

luckily, about 80% of the time kelly has already figured out the message, then we discuss for a few moments.

it isn’t often that we are left without a real guess at what a plate or frame might mean, but yesterday we met our match.

there was nothing remarkable about the car, the plate or the motorist inside. but the license frame has vexed me for many hours already.

here was the message:

i pay taxes on both sides of the road

what does that mean?

seriously…what are they talking about?

thoughts, please!

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we’re going to the zoo. it should be an anima-tastic adventure. pictures to follow.

but until then:

If aliens from outerspace ever come and we show them our civilization and they make fun of it, we should say we were just kidding, that this isn’t really our civilization, but a gag we hoped they would like. Then we tell them to come back in 20 years to see our real civilization. After that, we start a crash program of coming up with an impressive new civilization. Either that, or just shoot down the aliens as they’re waving goodbye.
– Jack Handey

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like the seedy mall parking lot carnival that comes and goes just like the jungle rain, montananza/montraveganza/montanorama is over.

i apologize that our posts were not prompt or routined as the others have been, but we were denied internet during our 16 hour drive from jackson hole, wyoming to hanford, california. the subaru got us back safe and sound and quite tired out.

along the way kelly and i had wonderful hours of conversation and laughter.

in nevada, america’s cesspool, we stopped at del taco where we sat in the drive-through for 25 minutes, blocked by vehicles and forced to increase our carbon footprint. what could be done?

we are glad to be home. very glad. we loved our trip for many reasons. i learned much that i didn’t know before, and it was wonderful to spend so much time with my wife. plus, it was a good time of music listening and blog-honing.

so, as we close our montana log, i will give a listening list from the trip. i heartily recommend any and all of these folks…

- lots of pastor Don McClure…mostly the Character Studies series
- the entire Wes Montgomery catalogue
- Copeland: Beneath Medicine Tree | Eat, Sleep, Repeat
- Sarah McLachlan: Mirrorball | Afterglow | and the christmas album (i know we’re bad…)
- George Benson: This Is Jazz 9
- my Phil Wickham anthology
- the entire Nickel Creek catalogue
- Chris Thile: Not All Who Wander Are Lost | Deceiver
- the entire David Crowder catalogue (OF COURSE!)
- Shane and Shane (not sure what because i was asleep for most of that)
- Kelly Clarkson: whatever her debut album is called
- the entire Tim Hughes catalogue
- Tim McGraw selections
- U2: How To Dismantle An Atomic Bomb
- Deliriou5? – The Mission Bell | King of Fools
- Sufjan Stevens: The Dress Looks Nice On You

get into some music. do it now!

well, thanks for reading. and don’t stop reading. because if you do you’ll never know the answer to my riddle:

what 2 things do california and montana have in common?

the truth will surpise you.

farewell montananza. we hardly knew ye. we were honored to share our music and blessed at the time spent with our fellow christians.

in other news, i have decided what my next recording project will be. project date: 2032.

post over.

blessings.

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so, since we’ve officially left Montana it seems to me that Montananza has ended. now, we journey home by way of yellowstone national park. and NATIONAL IT WAS!

but, before today’s update i have to tell you about something AMAZING we both forgot to report on from yesterday.

before church we moseyed into the continental breakfast at the best western for a quick bite. there were a few other people filtering in and out. the continental breakfast was exactly what it always is…some soft-bruised fruit, 2 kinds of cereal (since one is bran based the other must be what? rice based. of course.), slightly-cooler-than-room-temperature milk and the gnarly waffle maker you use yourself. you know the kind (at least if you ever ate in a cafeteria), the batter sits in the little wax-paper cups, you pour it in and flip the grill, wait 2:40 and then DING! you have one half-burnt, half-goo waffle, because after all your batter separated into 2 parts in the cup…the first part is the flour-based meatiness of the future-waffle, and the second is the botulized egg/dust/fly corpses that sits on top.

then, as we are eating, some montanans come in and one of them braves the waffler. after the not-so-pleasant ding they open up the machine and look at their somewhat golden brown waffle, waiting to be eaten. one of them remarks, “ooh that looks nice.” to which the maker of the waffle says, “of course it does…this is montana…YOU AIN’T IN SAN FRANCISCO!”

what does that mean? what does that mean? can someone please tell me?

aside from that…i ate in the fpu cafeteria for 4 years. 4 years. and i’d rather die than eat one of those waffles. the manufacturer was the same as the one we had there. and…i mean…come on. i would rather never eat again than have to eat 1 half of 1 half of one waffle off that machine.

but come on…what does that mean? or did they close down all the 5 star restaurants in one of the most metropolitan, world-renown cities in the world?

but that was yesterday…this is today:

montana gave us an offering of rain this morning, which i didn’t mind at all. plus, the defaced subaru has seat warmers and a rear window wiper…so we were living high on the hog today.

rain gave way to this:

lots of driving and lots of wild. yellowstone did not disappoint (though, try as i might i could not find any yellow stones…but that’s ok for the following reasons…).

we drove down the east side of the park from the northern entrance (not the old faithful side, the other side). we were impressed at how often the terrain and feel of the park changes. but yeah, for my first time it was really fun…especially because of these guys:

yeah…we were about 10 yards away from this herd while we watched them roll in the dirt…scamper around…and threaten to walk into the road, stopping traffic indefinitely. I LOVED IT! was definitely the high point of the day for me. there are few things i enjoy more than big, woolen land animals meandering around the countryside.

we stopped at the roosevelt lodge for lunch…which was good. drove, drove, drove, saw some sulfur pits that were bubbling with anger and boiling water (smelled like home), drove, drove, drove, then suddenly saw a TON of people stopping quickly on the side of the road just outside the park. everyone was just staring into a field…so we stopped…and after a few minutes here’s what we saw:

that is a picture of 4 grizzly bears, a mama and her 3 cubs. it was amazing. they moved so fast (and quietly really) and were SO large. we loved it. i was a little sad that nearly 100 people were there, probably freaking our teddily friends out, but it was super rad nonetheless.

so yeah…great day. 12 hours of driving and some really neat wildlife. some other stuff happened, but i’ll leave that for kelly’s post.

time to turn in…another 12 hours of driving tomorrow, then home wednesday. the trip is far from over, but farewell montana. sorry you hated our car so much.

i leave you with this, one of our neighbors at the hotel tonight.

this guy is ready for something. i just wish i knew what it was.

blessings.

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it was kind of an uneventful day, at least by blogging standards. there were no fires, no asteroids, no bloodless coups, no lottery winnings, no nike endorsement either.

we did get a lot more nasty looks from our montanan neighbors…which…is simply mind-boggling to me. i can’t think of the last time i crushed a south carolinian’s rv windshield with a cinder block. can you?

kelly cataloged our activities today, so if you are interested then check out her blog. currently we’re chillaxin, watching a lame show on TLC, and figuring out our route to yellowstone.

now, i’ve never been to yellowstone and i have several expectations:

1) buffalos/bison/land orcas. a book that some friends let us borrow assured us that yellowstone often has what they call “buffalo jam,” namely, when a buffalo or many buffalos stand in the road…and stop traffic…and chew things slowly.

2) yellow stones. if there aren’t yellow stones i am going to have an angry blog.

QUICK ASIDE…the show we’re watching on TLC has the family sightseeing in FRESNO, CALIFORNIA…on the 180…taking pictures with oranges trees. and stealing oranges. currently they are literally screaming with delight at the sight of sequoia trees.

fun fact about the word ‘sequoia’…it has all the vowels. except Y. because Y isn’t a vowel. the show says they’re going to speak at a church…hopefully we’ll know it.

now back to our subject…

3) an endless cavalcade of chintzy gift shoppes filled with coasters, ash trays and out dated nature books.

and now back to our ASIDE….the reality family, which is about to speak at a church and has been saying really angry and inappropriate things to each other for the last 15 minutes, is in sequoia natl forest stealing pine cones and generally leaving the paths (despite the well-placed signs asking visitors to not do so) and causing a lot of expediated decay of the forest. lame. i want to report them. then again, since they have sextuplets no one will care. boo!

does anyone else miss the old itunes commercials now that the new ones are out? i do. i also miss the days when itunes didn’t update every other day and didn’t take over my pc resources whenever it is open.

see? not much happened today. at least, not much that kelly didn’t report on AND is blogworthy. see the bind we’re in? quite.

except this of course:

i have nothing to say…because i’m speechless.

so, TLC show is finally at the fresnan church they spoke at…which is one that the ole’ college hour worship team played at once. fun. i’ve been there. and so was a TLC camera crew. and some angry people who have their own show.

and, after seeing the church footage, i am (as usual) thoroughly grossed out at what was broadcast as ‘church.’

speaking of church, we missed our church today, and we missed it lots. a good reminder as to why we don’t want to travel lots.

OH! today we saw a bumper sticker that really made us reel with delight. we tried to get a picture, but we failed. it was on a montanan vehicle (of course) and read:

Blaming Guns For Killing People Is Like Blaming Spoons For Making Rosie O’Donnell Fat

wow.

wow.

ok…this post is a lot of fluff, so here comes the end.

right…

NOW!

blessings

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so…since today was concert day i thought i might retitle the post ad hoc. do i know the 100% proper use of ‘ad hoc?’ of course not. will that stop me? no. no ad hoc. presently.

today was indeed concert day, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. our morning began with a nice and hearty breakfast with pastor dale lewis and wife, donna, at perkins cafe in uptown hamilton. i had oatmeal and hashbrowns…my faithful standby when subjected to “the most important meal of the day.”

after breakfast (where we got to talk shoppe extensively) we went on the grand tour of the church building. it was built many years ago, just like our own wonderfully quirky building back home. then we headed out with pastor dale to see hamilton. we saw the downtown area, daly mansion, some hawks and some victorian buildings. oh, and we saw the GSK building…yes, the pharmaceutical GSK (oh good, now i will have the wonderful opportunity of getting another hundred spam pharmecy hits per day).

after that kelly and i took a trip down to Out West Ice Cream Parlor (sorry about the lame-o picture…it’s a cellular), where i feasted on lemon custard (quite good) and kelly enjoyed huckleberry. i did not like the huckleberry. i also don’t like the country music video that is on the tv right now.

thanks Out West Ice Cream Parlor!

so…having returned to the hotel we made quite the discovery…

somewhere between idaho and montana our the hood of our rental car was mercilessly keyed. now, we got A LOT of bad looks in idaho…but this was pretty amazing to us. i mean…who actually keys the cars of strangers? had i made remarks about the offender’s mother…or wife…or dog…then i could understand…but this person actually just keyed a car simply because the license plates bore the word “california.” lame.

the joke’s on them though…it’s a RENTAL and we got insurance on it. ba ha. we are win.

but yeah, that’s kinda a drag. oh well.

the concert tonight was a lot of fun. free bbq in a park followed by music is a no-brainer. the gear was all really professional and the atmosphere was non-idahoic…so…there you go.

i suspect that kellster will post a bit more about the concert…so i’m going to wrap up my entry. plus, there are few things i enjoy less than talking about my own playing. suffice it to say, i had fun, learned some things and was blessed by a really, Really, REALLY old woman who came up to me afterward and leaned into my ear and said, “thanks so much for coming…here…hold out your hand,” at which point she poured the contents of her change purse into my hand. the bill, quarters, dimes and nickels totaled $2.50, and i was utterly encouraged, not by the dollars, but by the warmth of this woman’s heart. hard to accept…yes. wonderful to accept…yes. thanks for the spiritual encouragement Lord!

discovery and TLC are sharing our interest right now. deadliest catch is running a marathon, but ‘little people, big world’ is stealing our hearts as well.

um…i can’t think of much else to say…we’re excited for worship tomorrow…church in general really…but will miss our own services back in h-town. i can only hope to catch the webcast if we have the time.

i hope you enjoy church tomorrow…or, if you are reading AFTER sunday morning, i hope you enjoyed church.

oh and one more thing…one concert picture…

for some reason i felt an oppressive presence whilst playing…i couldn’t figure it out until i took a closer look at the picture…once i did i discovered the problem straight away.

i hope you can see what i see…

ba!

blessings

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our day started early…but not TOO early. kelly and i had a thumbs down sleeping experience last night. the hotel was fine (complete with horsen!) but we just couldn’t get to sleep. we’re crossing our fingers for tonight.

about 4 hours into our drive today we were REAL glad we muscled through 12 hours of driving on day 1. so, now we can happily say:

twin falls to hamilton DONE!

want proof? we got proof!

the truth is that we pensieros don’t know much about montana. at this point we know that it is a state in the union…it has some mountains…and….it’s….at an elevation of 6995 feet above sea level….

now…from the pie-in-the-sky/i-want-to-move-to-idaho-and-montana tales we’ve heard from SO many people back home we were half expecting 40 acres and a llama free at the border from the chamber of commerce…maybe the homestead commission…but it didn’t happen. we DID get to see some mrad wildlife…llamas, lots of horses, lots of cows (who all seemed very happy by the way) and even a deer. a lady deer. a bounding lady deer who bounded away from the road as we drove close to her.

the drive was real nice. kelly’s blog has a bit on the moon pie field we came across. most of today’s trip was along the scenic 93 north…much of which follows the Salmon River through idaho. though the physical terrain of the 2 states we visited today was reminiscent of of the sequoias or yosemite, it was a fun new experience to drive along a river for a hundred miles or more. we even stopped and went down, both almost falling on the gravel…then both almost falling into the river. river rocks are slippy.

(school of rock is on cartoon network right now…how does that work?)

another fun stop was at the very beginning of our drive today…some bridge in Twin Falls. we loved it. quite a view. AND i’m pretty sure i played at the golf course on Tiger Woods Golf back when i was an RA at fpu.

this is the top of the bridge. i suppose you’d like to see the view from the bridge…

too bad. i only have a few minutes until Man Vs. Wild comes on…and…it’s a new one…and i just don’t have time to edit another photo right now. sorry…sort of.

highlights:

- sign for a local restaurant reads: “Welcome. Open 9 to 5…Usually.” nice.

- a scale model of the statue of liberty in somebody’s front yard…but not tastefully placed.

- Judy at burger king (WHY DIDN’T WE GET A PICTURE?!?!?!) who made us almost want to become AARP cashiers at said restaurant.

- knowing we don’t have to drive tomorrow. ba ha!

lowlights:

- we tuckered out today. that’s alright.

- we had to watch a lot of junky shows on discovery (hey…i love discovery channel…but today was National Boredom Day) before Man Vs. Wild came on.

- at burger king i had to utilize the rest room. when i walked in a teenage kid was washing a dress shirt in the bathroom sink…with the bathroom soap…and the bathroom water…and…it reminded me of that terrible moment where my dad and i made a shocking discovery in a carl’s jr. bathroom on a trip to disneyland. and…i don’t want to be reminded of that moment. ever, ever again.

so yeah, today was a great day. good times of prayer and talking with my lovely wife. and…it’s always fun to see a new place. we felt like nomads. or vagabonds. or…travelers.

although, i am a bit worried about the effects on this trip on kelly…i mean…this is what happened today:

oh man…all that Tazo tea has changed kelly into the eco-friend you see above.

truly, we’re already eco-friends. at least as much as very conservative republicans can be. hmm. that is fodder for another post. another post that i’m never going to post about.

so, today is about over. i hope Bear survives today’s episode.

i keep trying to convince myself it’s possible to be jet-lagged in a time zone 1 hour different than usual. in which case, label me lagged!

tomorrow…music time. huzzah! although i am a TINY bit nervous because i found out they’ve been playing radio promos for the event every 2 hours for days and days….the pressure’s on Geno. maybe i should’ve brought a guitar…

devotional thought for the day…no complete thoughts (yet)…just the importance of finishing well. so few of the kings of israel and judah finished well. and…recently i’ve been thinking about how i live like a king, not in attitude but in wealth, position and opportunity. i want to serve well (all israel’s kings were meant to serve), but i want to finish well too. and, finishing well is every day, all day.

oh! we learned one more thing about Montana today…

we learned to NOT MESS WITH MONTANA…because i mean…it’s protected by beardcore. do i know what beardcore is? no. do i fear beardcore? yes. a resounding yes. i mean…i can’t even GROW a beard…and apparently these bearded mercenaries have taken control of security for the state. if it’s on the lower left corner of the state sign it must be true. mustn’t it? MUSTN’T IT?

may beardcore have mercy on our california-plated car.

blessings.

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ok…day 1 is just about over. we made it from h-town to Twin Falls, Idaho in 12.5 leisurely hours. currently we’re polishing up our blogs, letting phil wickham’s new song sink in, and catching the end of The Deadliest Catch on discovery channel (apparantly the green-horn is not pulling his weight…gadzooks!). i love the discovery channel. it makes me want to get cable…except i only want discovery channel…nothing else. can someone please work on that for me?

so…not a ton to report. we had a great drive. the 99North to the 80East to the 93North. i thought i might lose my marbles on the 80…it was long…and deserty…and bleak. bleak like the bleakness on Ceti Alpha 5 on star trek 2: the wrath of khan.

driving in nevada makes humble country folk like us feel a bit…covered-in-slime-y…too man casinos…too much litter…too many REALLY lame slogans on billboards. (the following as reported from kelly) “Lovelock” (a town in nevada), “Where Your Love Stays Locked.” wow.

on a road safety sign: “Fog May Be Icy.” what does that mean? i mean…what does that mean? the central valley of california has some world famous fog…but…i don’t know what that means.

there were others…we don’t have time or bandwidth to share it all. we received some fun news from our friends the Belmonts, we had some gross fast food, and we discovered that apparently there are gas stations that don’t accept credit cards…only cash and debit…what does that mean???

got some really dirty looks at dinner tonight and discussed what the california-give-aways might be…perhaps my SLIGHTLY derelicte shirt…perhaps our freshly shorn (and kelly’s colored) hair…perhaps my wicked tattoo…perhaps the bumper sticker i put on my face that said “born and bred on the Left Coast.” not sure what it could be. so…yeah…definitely had some very clearly disapproving glances.

but the good news is that willie nelson is playing in this….establishment come july. i wish you could appreciate the junkiness of cactus pete’s as much as we did when we drove by.

good luck willie.

fyi: check kelly’s blog for a softer log of montananza.

blessings.